For my dear readers who have so patiently endured the construction posts detailing the making of this garment, I thank you for your longsuffering. The wrapper is done - except the petticoat, but it is totally wearable as-is with plain petticoats - and, until I decide I need to make another one, you will hear of the wrapper no more. At least, potentially. :)
However, this will not be just a wrapper-post. I will get into the dangerous waters of talking about modesty. I don’t want to talk about it but feel that I ought to since, it seems, more often lately, I have heard from ladies and young ladies who admire modest attire and take it for granted that I am a modestly dressed person. For the past few months I have felt very hypocritical about allowing such things to be thought - because, the truth is, I don’t believe, per se, in “modesty”.
I *used* to. Oh yes, for many years I draped myself in long, dark clothes which slowly crept into historic fashion, which I totally fell in love with. My mother was concerned at the time because she thought I was becoming legalistic. I thought I wasn’t - but I was. In my late teens I was so judgemental and critical of others who did not have the same standards of dress that I did. The Lord is so gracious, and thankfully has shown me, gently, that my ways are not His ways. . .and He leads everyone according to His plan for them. My clothes are my own matters. Other people’s clothes are their own matters. I have enough to do trying to run my own life. Other people have enough to do running their own lives!
When I went to college at age 18, I wore “weird” clothes. They probably would be considered modest by most modern day people, but I didn’t really wear them *because* they were modest. It was because I thought they were pretty, a little different and it was what I liked. I experienced some snobbery from other “modestly” dressed girls, who usually had cliques and little sub-groups. I felt they didn't like me or accept me because I didn't wear what they did - jean skirts with slits in the back or sides, polo shirts and the latest in runniing shoes. My gunne sax dresses, lacey shawls and granny boots condemned me to other "black sheep" - who were, in fact, some of the most interesting people I've ever known. I felt an outcast. One person who was always very nice and pleasant was a girl with dreadlocks and who dressed in Goth style clothing. I never knew her name, but we chatted in the bathroom or the halls and smiled and nodded when we’d pass each other on the way to classes. She told me she liked the way I dressed and often asked about different skirts I wore or a long green coat I patterned and made. My best girl friend in college was Joyce, who never wore skirts or dresses. In fact, on the last day of class she said she’d wear a skirt if I wore trousers (since she had never seen me in pants!) so we did. :)
I could go on and on with similar experiences - but in the end, I realized that trying to be modest was not for me because it automaticaly made me have a bad attitude towards those who were not dressed as I thought they should be. My own thoughts of modesty set a standard I thought everyone should adhere to! So now I just dress in what works for me and how I feel God wants *me* to dress. And *for me*. I have come to the conclusion that what is right *for me* is probably not just right for everyone else. Look at the idea of modesty. For some it means to be clad head to toe in long, loose garments with head coverings and thick dark stockings and shoes. For others, a long denim skirt and a comfortably loose t-shirt does the trick. For others, a knee-length skirt or even trousers is enough to make them feel comfortable. Other girls like to wear short-shorts and cropped tops. And everyone in these cases may feel they are dressed comfortable, attractively and appropriately. Will they all agree with each other? Probably most definitely not! But they have chosen what they feel is the best choice for themselves, for whatever reasons or standards they have.
I like long skirts. I like clothes that do not emphasize every roll or bump. I like historic fashion. Okay. I LOVE historic fashion!! So that is what influences my clothing choices. Is my clothing “modest”? To me, it is. But I prefer not to use the word “modest” since it really has no set meaning that is the same for each person. And historic fashion is not necessarily modest. In fact, almost ever fashion era I've studied emphasizes the female form which many do not consider to be modest. Women "back then" wanted to appear attractive and desirable. Human nature has not changed with the years. My mother told me several times about how she thought regency gowns could be immodest because they emphasize the bosom, and how 1860's styles could be considered immodest because they are so tightly fitted through the bodice. And - her observations are totally right.
So yesterday I wore my wrapper in public, to several stores and to a park where we picnicked and walked around. It was fun, I felt comfortable and I found out that yes, a supportive undergarment of some kind is necessary with this. :P
And a girl with short shorts told me she liked it. :)
Love,
Sarah
